Ranch Poem – “I am here to sing songs”

10/3/19
I am here to sing songs

 

I am not here to put
boundaries around your love.
I am not here to own
you or claim you like some prize.
I am not here to demand
that I be the only one you share intimacy with.
I am not here to mold
you to be some version of you that I desire.
I am not here to use your love
for me as a substitute for my love for self.
I am not here to write out

your commitments for you.
I am not here to expect
you to go anywhere that you don’t want to go.
I am not here to expect
you to be anything more than you are.
I am not here to expect
you to give anything more than you can.
I am not here to need
you to make everything okay and secure.

I am here to sing songs
to you while I drive us somewhere new.
I am here to hold space
for your emotions, spoken or not.
I am here to take photos
of our best moments and organize them.
I am here to write poems
and to show you what I’ve learned.
I am here to listen
to the needs you have today and every day.
I am here to gift
you the things that you won’t gift yourself.
I am here to be patient
with you when skies are grey.
I am here to warm
your feet when the covers aren’t enough.
I am here to help
you pick a movie, audiobook or CBD product.
I am here to trust

your ability to follow your heart.

– RwmG

Ranch Poem – “Determined”

3/12/18

Determined

I have been in some weird and dark places.
Memories so far and forgotten.
Homes of strangers, rainy festival lots,
anxieties where I found myself lost.

They stand in contrast to my reality now.
Blessings abound in every direction of my life.
No more do I stare at the same
floor night and day.

A thirst for life, love, and to
strive for my highest dream.
Determine to be the best man
for my loved ones, for me.

– RwmG

Ranch Essay – “Magnets”

The power of love came into me
And I became fierce like a lion,
then tender like the evening star.” – Rumi

All of my life, I have talked about what kind of women I was most attracted to, and what my life partner may be like. It’s something that so many of us do, perhaps to manifest him or her into our lives. And they often do appear and take that position in our lives, adding & never subtracting.

At first though, it’s something like velcro. The connection is a lucky coincidence and it is easily removed and attached again, and removed and attached again. All the while, we wait for the velcro to wear and stick together less and less, because it always seems to.

But sometimes it doesn’t. We are convinced, however, that we have our big, important reasons to have nothing or no one to stick to. We feel like attachment to this unworn connection needs to be cut, sometimes out of fear, sometimes out of ego, sometimes self-sabotage. We reluctantly pry ourselves from the other, only to find that the space between exists only for an instant…You then realize that they are a (+) magnet and you are a (-). The pull to be near your love, or smack on top of them, is unending.

Any theoretical thoughts about what is most attractive, or what it is that turns us on, or makes our heart sing, all of that kind of disappears. Without our guard up, in the pull of the newly ceaseless connection, we look at our partner, blink, and understand that their face, body, mind, heart, scent, voice – all of it is enough, it is set in stone in our heart.

This doesn’t mean that every pair of magnets live happily together forever. We can become even more scared and freaked out once we have a clarity in our heart and a partner is found. This fear is pervasive in our society today. It means that we are a new kind of vulnerable, the kind that we are often not prepared for. This is when courage comes in handy. The courage to be that magnet, and to float inside that connection with honesty and self-less love.

Ranch Poem – “Soothing Suffering”


5/16/2012

“Soothing Suffering”

Sit down in this familiar, boundless tub
and soak and scrub
in a bath of mindfulness.
Undo these knots of despair
but don’t ignore your pains
as if they weren’t there.
Open circulation to the mind,
release this tension that binds
these poisons to our lives.
You don’t have to worry
about the tap getting cold.
Transformation is happening.
Loosen sorrow’s hold,
something will change.
Look no further for treatment
greet your internal relief
generating careful energies
as you breathe.
Our massage of understanding,
Soothing suffering.

RwmG

Ranch Poem – “set you high, or bring you down”

6/14/06

“set you high, or bring you down”

sometimes I sit around and wear out my eyes
figuratively exposing this blinding life
for what it will and what it should lead to.
b-sides of this awesome group of bards
reaching out with angst, reaching out far

but this strange feeling in my core
will be tapped forevermore, when I concentrate
and reclaim my grasp from a later date
this people will become sensitive to sensitivity
and the irony will play out, to you, you, and me

if only a trip was safe
if only brain loss and traffic didn’t exist
then so many lives would never erase
themselves and leave us with the rest of this

so, my lovers and friends alike
teach yourself over again, and decide what’s the right
place to settle down, and doctrine to follow around.
hear wisdom from an old man’s voice
but understand that it holds all his life’s choice
and can set you high, or bring you down

RwmG

Ranch Poem- “The Soloist”

3/10/12

The Soloist

Teary-eyed on jail pay phone
trying to be strong
to be positive
in the distorted face of
incarceration
A year of searching
the existential cracks of
one’s saddened heart
for belief in a life
that exists in memory
and in hopeful plans
Pains untreated
Smiles depleted
Family, friends, love
Despite the suffering
these are noble desires
that tear asunder
the soloist
standing alone among strangers
swirling lost and chained
tearing layers from lips
with sore teeth
wondering to no avail
about “them”
and what they really think
about me
Are they already afraid?
How will they know me?
Am I changed?
Taken down a peg
Joining the disadvantaged
Waving goodbye to old habits,
evil deeds, and invincibility
But what about what made me happy?
Will I have to wait much longer
to know them once again?
Wireless outernet disconnection
Dubstep in commercials taunting
convict conversation reruns
This isn’t quite me sometimes
with the constricted choices
trying to pick the middle way
fighting unsatisfactoryness
Jail sangha somehow tough
Is this the base camp for the summit?
Springing forward tenderly
December’s twenty-first
Who, what, when, where, why, how
will I be?

RwmG

Ranch Poem – “This way, That way”

2/10/07

This way, That way

I see the way when I close my eyes.
That red, blue, and green starry sky.
A search for life’s bounty and the headwaters of grace.

I see the way when I think of death.
The billowing the covering of it.
As it pours from Fate’s flame.

I see the way when we ride.
In and out, near and far, the right lane.
The right path on another fossil fuel journey.

I see the way when your eyes tear up.
The wetness from all the mess they left us.
And in the involuntary way your face contracts.

I see the way right here playing loud.
The same way generations were defined.
The way vibrations can impact the soul.

I see the way but never expected to see it.
The direction that changed. The change of change.
And now that I know, I always will.

I see the way in a crowded club, the nexus between.
How she swings that backside side to side.
And how a suit and an addict can dance the same dance.

I see the way outside just yesterday.
The constant movement. The rush.
I see it then, next week, tomorrow and today.

I see it this way.
Some people are so ashamed.
Others are so damn mad.
Some people are sane.
Others just got it bad.
Some people cry and weep.
Others play it safe.
Some people take a leap.
Others live as fakes.
Some people play music.
Others shoot craps.
Some people are here.
Others never were.
Some people fear.
Others got the nerve.
I see it that way.

RwmG

Ranch Poem – “Mother Ganges”

2007

“Mother Ganges”

As I merged with the river,
I separated from all the unknown.
Soaked with the inner mirror
my being had shown.

An infection may maim,
while the body suffers and pains.
The self still strives upward,
your mind never falls lame.

I seek liberation from the bad and the good,
because a forest fire is still fueled by wood.
To experience the ultimate, ten-fold.
The ground beneath my feet on an eternal stroll.

A witness to a mighty gust of wind, a slow burning flame,
the passing of friends, a newborn named.
The role of all lifetimes submerged into her waves.
To search. To never find a poison that saves.

RwmG